Response and Advice to the Post ‘To Khul’ a Mockingbird’, or A Woman’s Right to Divorce and Website’s Owner and Writers.
All the praise is for Allah, and blessing and peace be upon the Messenger of Allah.
That which follows after:
This is some advice of the owner of this Blog Islamwich , and the writers on it.
Related to a posted titled :
‘To Khul’ a Mockingbird’, or A Woman’s Right to Divorce
JULY 23, 2015 BY UMDAYO
One of the mistakes in this post was from the post you said ” And we have no record of Prophet Muhammad, peace and blessings be upon him, ever telling a woman no, she could not be granted this right (woman requesting divorce), and she should be patient and return to the man she could not respect, love or even like.”
You are not correct:
Case of Tamimah bint Wahb of Banu Malik an-Najjar of Khazraj.
She was married to Rifa’a b. Samawel al-Qurayzi. He divorced her irrevocably, and after the waiting period she married Abdu’r rahman b. Zubayr. She went to see the Prophet while he was sitting with Aishah and Abu Bakr, and Khalid b. Said was at the door. She wanted release from Abdu’r Rahman, because ‘he only had something like the fringe of a garment’, she said, showing the fringe of her veil. This either meant he had a very small penis, or he was impotent and had been unable to consummate the marriage. It was said he was averse to her, and divorced her, and Rifa’a wanted to remarry her. Khalid was shocked to hear her speak to the Prophet like this and asked Abu Bakr why he did not stop her. The Prophet did nothing but smile. He told her that she could not return to Rifa’a until Abdu’r Rahman had consummated the marriage. He told Rifa’a that ‘she is unlawful to you until she has tasted the sweetness (consummated the marriage).’ Chapter 71. number 4964 Book of Divorce this can be found in al Bukharee .
Correct meaning of the word Khula :
“The section in the book of Nikah (Marriage) الخلع (al Khula) , this word linguistic meaning is to take off something like clothing.
Its shariah meaning; to return one’s mahr or sadaaq of her husband due to a lawful reason freeing her from her marriage from her request and him granting it base upon returning the mahr. The choice to grant it, and power, is in his hand or Islamic Judge only.
This is a section in Nikah that many of us neglect and not fully understand it, the Messenger of Allah sallahu wa alayhi wa salam said about the woman who request for Khula without lawful reason ” whoever (of the women) ask her husband for divorce (for no reason) will not smell the fragrance of Jannah” Saheeh hadeeth Thrmidi and Sunnah Abi Dawud
In another narration : al-mukhtali-a’atu huna almunafiqaat “the women who request Khula from them women are the Munafiqaat hypocrites” Saheeeh hadeeith meaning those who seek khula for no valid reason.
- Another mistake of yours you wrote related to Khula not being able to re- marry the same person after a khula:
“I got to keep my dowry (because of talaq due to the courts), and he got to reserve the chance to marry me again in the future, if I chose to do so– which is a right not given after a khul“.
This is incorrect that you say “the chance to marry me again in the future, if I chose to do so – which is a right not given after a Khula”. After the Khula and if the woman wants to remarry the man she may do so with a new marriage contract.
You are misinform about khula’s details, which a Khula is granted there is no returning to that spouse during her iddah period which is one menstrual cycle, when a man pronounce talaq on his wife he can return back to her during the iddah period, not in the case of khula it takes affect when it is given, and the marriage is null. There must be a new marriage contract in the case of a Khula if the two wants to be married again. Please read for reference ->
Neither was this reply was to say this sister should stay with this marriage, or to belittle her calamity, but from the point she said the prophet peace be upon him
she is incorrect and misinform due to being limited in her knowledge.
Next from the point of professional writing for Islamic websites or blogs, not mixing personal hatred for a person due to being scorn so all their writings shows this, even bad language, or insulting other Muslims previous spouses, or Imams, or former spouse family.
There is a manner and professionalism that Muslims writers who claim they have Islamic Blogs and Websites to promote Islam, and the teachings of Islam or Islamic learning page should hold black from post like this.
” If you are a non-Muslim who would like to know more about Islam and the people who choose to live an Islamic life “
It’s not professional that she said about her x-husband who is still a Muslim no matter how much she dislikes him, neither is it correct manners. As the person who wrote this post when you read their about introduction it’s filled with her being scorned from her sour marriage, where she defame this man’s character by calling him a Milk-Shaykh.
“Having recently divorced her husband, the Milksheikh”.
Allah detest this, Allah the Most High say in Quran:
يَا أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا لا يَسْخَرْ قَومٌ مِنْ قَوْمٍ عَسَى أَنْ يَكُونُوا خَيْراً مِنْهُمْ وَلا نِسَاءٌ مِنْ نِسَاءٍ عَسَى أَنْ يَكُنَّ خَيْراً مِنْهُنَّ
O you who believe! Let not a group scoff at another group, it may be that the latter are better than the former. Nor let (some) women scoff at other women, it may be that the latter are better than the former. Nor defame one another, nor insult one another by nicknames. How bad is it to insult one’s brother after having Faith [i.e. to call your Muslim brother (a faithful believer) as: “O sinner”, or “O wicked”]. And whosoever does not repent, then such are indeed Zalimun (wrong-doers, etc.).
AL Hurjaat verse 11
Then Allah names this person who do this and do not repent as dhalimoon the wrong doers.
وَمَنْ لَمْ يَتُبْ
And whosoever does not repent,
فَأُوْلَئِكَ هُمْ الظَّالِمُونَ
then such are indeed Dhalimun (wrong-doers, etc.).
al Hujaraat: 11
From him repentance is an obligation ‘ And whosoever does not repent, [ from insult name calling ]then such are indeed Dhalimun (wrong-doers, etc.).’
Would she now belittle her x-husband in front of his children and call him the milkshaykh, if she do it in public online, most likely she will say it to his children and this is also disliked, and incorrect manners for raising Muslim children with good manners even if she hates their father. No matter how much she hate him, those children he is still their father. We should show patience, may Allah make it easy for her and ease her calamity.
This is not befitting for an Islamic website, even if it claims to post their views and thoughts. When you title, and aim your website to be for teaching Islam you must have a few things if not should stay away from talking about Islam.
1. Sincere
2. Correct Knowledge
3. Correct Islamic Manners
1 Related to Sincerity:
‘Umar ibn al-Khattab relates that he heard the Messenger of Allah, sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, say, “Verily actions are by intentions, and for every person is what he intended. So the one whose hijrah was to Allah and His Messenger, then his hijrah was to Allah and His Messenger. And the one whose hijrah was for the world to gain from it, or a woman to marry her, then his hijrah was to what he made hijrah for.” [Agreed upon]
2 Correct Knowledge:
12.108 “Say: “This is my Way: I do invite unto Allah,- with certain knowledge, – I and whoever follows me. Glory to Allah, and never will I join gods with Allah!”
It is known that the Messenger of Allah sallahu wa alayhi wa salam call to Allah with knowledge and he was the most knowledgeable of mankind to know about Allah. When he sent his companions to invite people to Islam, he did not send the one who had the less knowledge rather he sent the one who has the most knowledge.
As Mu’adh was known the most to have knowledge about the halaal and haraam.
In another hadith narrated upon the authority of Anas ibn Maalik (May Allah be pleased with him) who said that the Messenger of Allah peace be upon him said:
“The most merciful person from my nation, to my nation is Abu Bakr and the sternest of them regarding the command of Allah is ‘Umar and the shyest of them is ‘Uthmaan and the most knowledgeable of them regarding the recitation of the Qur’an is Ubayy ibn Ka’b and the most dutiful of them is Zaid ibn Thaabit and the most knowledgeable of them as regards the permissible and the impermissible is Mu’adh ibn Jabal. Every nation has someone who is (known to be extremely) trustworthy and the trustworthy one of this nation is Abu ‘Ubaidah ibn Al-Jarraah.”
The Messenger of Allah sallahu wa alayhi wa salam sent Mu’adh to Yemen, due to his knowledge.
In another hadith narrated upon the authority of Mu’adh ibn Jabal (May Allah be pleased with him) who said:
“The Prophet peace be upon him said to Mu’adh ibn Jabal when he was about to send him to Yemen: ‘How will you judge (between the people) if it so happens that you must judge?’ He (Mu’adh ibn Jabal) said: ‘I will judge according to the Book of Allah.’ He (the Messenger of Allah r then) said: ‘What if (the legal ruling) is not found in the book of Allah?’ He (Mu’adh ibn Jabal) replied: ‘Then (I will judge) according to the Sunnah of the Messenger of Allah peace be upon him.’ He (the Messenger of Allah r) then said: ‘What if (the legal ruling) is not found in the Sunnah of the Messenger of Allah peace be upon him?’ He (Mu’adh ibn Jabal) replied: ‘Then I will use my independent judgment and I won’t spare any effort (to try to come to the correct solution).’ He (the Messenger of Allah r) then struck me on my chest and said: ‘All praise is for Allah who rendered suitable the messenger of the Messenger of Allah and caused him to be in agreement with that which pleases His Messenger.”
Narrated Ibn Abbas:
When the Prophet sent Muadh to Yemen, he said to him, “You are going to a nation from the people of the Scripture, so let the first thing to which you will invite them, be the Tauhid of Allah. If they learn that, tell them that Allah has enjoined on them, five prayers to be offered in one day and one night. And if they pray, tell them that Allah has enjoined on them Zakat of their properties and it is to be taken from the rich among them and given to the poor. And if they agree to that, then take from them Zakat but avoid the best property of the people.”
……………………………..
3 The one who calls to Islam must have proper Islamic manners in front of the people and also in private:
Abū Hurayrah relates that Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said: “I have only been sent to perfect good moral character.” [Musnad Ahmad (8595)]
For the past year or so I been reading your blog Corbin because I like to see good writing skills as Muslims writers, as other places you write at online. But this does not mean because a person a good writer, that he or she can write or do what ever they want, when they claim their site for non Muslims to learn about Islam. Or promote associates who writes on your blog any type of behavior for the purpose of having contributors, and not losing them. You wrote an article online titled ‘The More You Know Him, The More You Love Him
(A Convert’s Reflections)’
Quote
“Muhammad was an advocate for blind justice. He said:
“Assist your Muslim brother, whether he be an oppressor or oppressed.”
And when a companion of the Prophet asked:
“But how shall we do it when he is an oppressor?”
Prophet Muhammad replied:
“Assisting an oppressor by forbidding and withholding him from oppression.” (Al-Bukhari, 2444) Justice of the Messenger of Allah sallahu wa alayhi wa salam, ” end of quote.
This is a very bad introduction for a non Muslim reading post mix with emotions and hatred (Milk Shaykh), and misinformation, and stated in the about page ‘mix with American culture’. Which in Islam as long as the culture do not conflict with Islam, there is no problem. Not by gossip or unlawful backbiting, and making fun of other Muslims. Because that is no different from the non Muslim American culture that they see every where in the media, and in their society gossip, slander, name calling, backbiting, tabloids and etc, all in the name of hot topics, and amusement to keep an audience, Allah detest this.
If you want to help sisters who are in hardship make a special group for them and aid them as they need to be aided. Support groups, financial groups, sisterhood groups, a forum for them where it is private and their hardship and calamity is not going to be viewed to the public, so they do not become another victim or victimized by the internet. Where sisters can get proper Islamic education without layman’s wishful thinking for there no room for wishful thinking in Islam. As Allah the Most High said in Quran:
” It is not for a believer, man or woman, when Allah and His Messenger have decreed a matter that they should have any option in their decision. And whoever disobeys Allah and His Messenger, he has indeed strayed in a plain error.”
33;36
Be mindful speaking about Allah or Islam without knowledge in Islam is a sin, Allah the Most High said:
قُلْ إِنَّمَا حَرَّمَ رَبِّيَ الْفَوَاحِشَ مَا ظَهَرَ مِنْهَا وَمَا بَطَنَ وَالْإِثْمَ وَالْبَغْيَ بِغَيْرِ الْحَقِّ وَأَنْ تُشْرِكُوا بِاللَّهِ مَا لَمْ يُنَزِّلْ بِهِ سُلْطَانًا وَأَنْ تَقُولُوا عَلَى اللَّهِ مَا لَا تَعْلَمُونَ
The meaning of which is:
Say: “(But) the things that my Lord has indeed forbidden are Al-Fawahish (great evil sins and every kind of unlawful sexual intercourse) whether committed openly or secretly, sins (of all kinds), unrighteous oppression, joining partners (in worship) with Allah for which He has given no authority, and saying things about Allah of which you have no knowledge.”
Shaykh-ul-Islaam Ibn ul-Qayyim, in his work, Madaarij as-Saalikeen. Shaykh-ul-Islaam mentions:
“As for speaking about Allah without knowledge then it is the most severe of all these prohibitions in its nature of being prohibited and the greatest of them in sinfulness. For this reason, it has been mentioned in the 4th position of the Haraam things, that all of the religions and legislation have agreed upon and it is never, ever permissible to speak about Allah without knowledge. It is never, ever other than Haraam.”
May Allah give you all tawfeeq ameen.
By Abul Baraa Muhammad Amreeki
Owner of Islam’s Finest website
Works of Abul Baraa Muhamad Amreeki 
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